From The Desk of The South

I'm on vaccation. I'm in Kennett, MO, home of Shreyl Crow. ;) LOL Anyway, just letting y'all know where I'm at if you don't hear from me. I know some have sent me some e-mails and since my parents are on the accient "dial-up" my internet time is short because I just can't take it. LOL

Couple of thoughts and when I get home I will follow up on them....

1. I feel sorry for out kids in church. I don't think they will ever know what to do with God or their faith in the simple places.

2. Racism and mild stupidity is alive and well in the South. I think I've lived in Canada for so long I thought this didn't exist.

Hope all is well.

READY?!?!?!!! O....KAY!!!!

So this morning I'm dressed and ready. I'm going to a church service. Yes, I said it, I am going to a church service. Don't faint. ;) LOL I'm not sure what to expect, I'm going to a lent service. I have never been to one so I decided to go. We'll how it goes. I'll let y'all know.

Sin?

picture by James Orah;link on the right for more of his art.

Ok, so on the lines of "sin". Knowing we are all behind that curtain to me is almost comforting. At least I know I'm not a lone in the "sin factor", but here is the deal, I know if I walked out from behind that curtain the others will poke their nose out and judge me. We all know it is true. Its much easier to deal with what is behind our curtain knowing someone else has it "worse" then us. Just a fact of life.

The other side of the coin. What if what we are hiding behind the curtain isn't a sin, but just who we are? God's creation, people who will NEVER reach perfection here on earth. I think we want our list so that we can say what is a sin and what is not. I think it comforts us, because then this whole "sin thing" is under lock and key. We understand it. But what if, what if we all just said, we are sinners who Christ died for. What happens then? The list doesn't matter so much, at least for me. My "sin" doesn't matter as much as knowing I'm a "sinner".

Just something to think about. At least something I have been at least.

Behind The Curtain

Would it surprise you to know I have a "secret sin"? One that no one knows about. Because of it I feel like the man behind the curtain. I let everyone see the acts, the tricks, the "game", but if you came to the curtain, pulled it back you would see the real me. Controlling what you see, showing just enough of my "true self" so not to really get anyone on my scent. I don't know what I'm going to with this "sin", but its there. It haunts me. I guess, when I'm ready to open the curtain then I will be ready to live life. I guess. I'm not sure any more. Sometimes I feel I live in complete confusion. I guess maybe we all do. I wonder if we just all admitted we are the person behind the curtain. I wonder what would happen. Would it make it easier to open the curtain and be more "real"? Who knows, I guess we may never know.

Over And Over

I have this song on repeat today. Thought I would share. LOL This is a song by
Nickel Creek, off their album Why Should the Fire Die

"Doubting Thomas"

What will be left when I've drawn my last breath

Besides the folks I've met and the folks who've known me

Will I discover a soul-saving love

Or just the dirt above and below me

I'm a doubting Thomas

I took a promise

But I do not feel safe

Oh me of little faith

Sometimes I pray for a slap in the face

Then I beg to be spared cause I'm a coward

If there's a master of death

I bet he's holding his breath

As I show the blind and tell the deaf about his power

I'm a doubting Thomas

I can't keep my promises

Cause I don't know what's safe

Oh me of little faith

Can I be used to help others find truth

When I'm scared I'll find proof that it's a lie

Can I be led down a trail dropping bread crumbs

That prove I'm not ready to die

Please give me time to decipher the signs

Please forgive me for time that I've wasted

I'm a doubting Thomas

I'll take your promise

Though I know nothin's safe

Oh me of little faith

T-Shirts

Someone asked what I meant about "becoming God". I think the song "T-Shirts" by Derek Webb describes what I'm talking about. I heard it today and so I thought I would post the lyrics. :)

they'll know us by the t-shirts that we wear

they'll know us by the way we point and stare

at anyone whose sin looks worse than ours

who cannot hide the scars of this curse that we all bare
they’ll know us by our picket lines and signs

they’ll know us by the pride we hide behind

like anyone on earth is living right

and isn’t that why Jesus died

not to make us think we’re right
chorus

when love, love, love

is what we should be known forlove, love, love

it’s the how and it’s the why we live and breathe and we die
they’ll know us by reasons we divide

and how we can’t seem to unify

because we’ve gotta sing songs a certain style

or we’ll walk right down that aisle

and just leave ‘em all behind
they’ll know us by the billboards that we make

just turning God’s words to cheap clichés

says “what part of murder don’t you understand?”

but we hate our fellow man

and point a finger at his grave
chorus

they'll know us by the t-shirts that we wear

they'll know us by the way we point and stare

telling ‘em their sins are worse than ours

thinking we can hide our scars

beneath these t-shirts that we wear

Oh, Come ON!!!

I watched to interviews with Sasha Cohen today. I couldn't help but think as she was putting on her big smile and her lil' speech, "oh, you know I just enjoy the sport, its not about the color of the medal", that I wanted her to say, "you know what it SUCKS. I can't believe a moment in time I worked so hard on..." LOL You know sometimes it would be nice to see that. To know that when you are looking at one of your moments in time where you failed big time and to see someone pubicly say, it SUCKS when you fail. Maybe that is just me, but I'm kind of tired of seeing us dress up "failure".